Kevin Riddle: From Overwhelm to Authenticity

00:00 

SRIDHAR KRISHNAMURTI: Hey, everybody. Welcome to an episode of How to Be a Real One Percenter. This is a podcast where we're redefining what it means to be a one percenter. No more the obsessive, driven, at all costs, success in one area, but this is more about how to love our life. Like, to be a real one percenter, it's about the quality and the experience of our life, and that includes both success and also just are we enjoying the ride or how happy are we? Today, I've got a very special guest, Kevin. Kevin, I really want to say firstly, thank you for being on the podcast. I appreciate you making the time, and we go back a ways. I'm just really, really pleased that you're here, so thanks for coming.   

00:45 

KEVIN RIDDLE: Yeah, thanks, Sridhar. Yeah, I feel actually pretty honoured and privileged to be on here today because if I was really honest, I wouldn't consider myself as a one percenter or something that you'd want to bring on this podcast, but look, I'll leave that for you to make that decision, but for me, it's always been about trying to get the best out of myself and being the real person that I am, and so I'm really excited about today and sharing, I guess, my story, which is the right words. 

01:19 

SRIDHAR KRISHNAMURTI: Yeah, I know why you said that, but yeah, I mean, look, the real one, I'm glad you said it that way, Kevin, because to me, the real one percent is a pathway, not necessarily a destination, and what you just said there is like, for me, a real one percenter is somebody dedicated to living their genuine life, and man, that's you, right? The conversations we have are not easy at times. I've often said we may do a lot of courageous things in our life, but the most courageous thing we'll ever do is actually hold up a mirror and be willing to look inside, and when I look at the consistency that you've done that, in a moment, we're going to find out some of the things that you've been through when you came, and I still remember a lot of them, but you had many opportunities where you could have run from that, and you've never have. 

It's been five years now. We were just discussing before today that we've been having our conversations for five years, and so absolutely, you've been dedicated to that one percent pathway, and it's been a joy for me to see what's come out of that for you in all aspects of your life, and business, and personal, and everything. But let's just go maybe take a trip back and build it up so that I'm looking forward to people out there, the watchers of the podcast, to hear your story, and I know there's a lot to learn from you in terms of what you've applied. 

So, the first question I have for you is really, what was your life like when you arrived to work with me, and expand, and start your real one percent journey, what were things like? 

02:54 

KEVIN RIDDLE: Well, I was, actually, we'll get onto this probably a little bit later, because there's some things we've even discussed in the last few months around the fact of things that have happened in my life, and I've got friends that have said, geez, Kev, things are always happening for you. But at that time, it was probably quite a real intense time. I was probably only a year, or 12 months, 15 months after my dad had been taken in a pretty tragic way. He had actually been murdered, and so it had been a pretty crazy ride, and almost sort of like an out-of-body experience. You're sort of looking at life going, wow, this is kind of crazy. 

There'd been court cases, and to be honest, there was putting strains on the marriage, and also had found out that my house that we were starting to renovate had bad EQC repairs on it, and all that sort of stuff.

03:58 

SRIDHAR KRISHNAMURTI: For people out of Christchurch, that means after the earthquakes in Christchurch, EQC came in when your house was what we called munted, Kevin, right? Your house had a lot of problems, and just for people that... I'm sure most New Zealanders would know EQC, but just to make sure. 

04:11 

KEVIN RIDDLE: Yeah, and it was crazy, because we'd already repaired one house and bought another one, thinking that it had already been repaired, and unfortunately, those repairs weren't great. So, we're doing that, and then, to be honest, I was starting to... probably didn't realise at the time, was really in a struggle with what was going on with running the business, because I'd been out of it quite a bit. At the time, I was leading the business, and it was just a lot was going on, and I felt completely overwhelmed. 

04:43 

SRIDHAR KRISHNAMURTI: And we should probably let the viewers know that you are co-owner of Computer Culture, which is a quite a successful IT service, as you will describe what it does more. I know that you've ... what I get from what you and your business partner, Craig, are about is just real genuine care for the people you serve, your staff, just a really great... one of those great companies. So just let everyone know that that's your... when you say the business, it's a very significant business that you started. 17? 

05:14 

KEVIN RIDDLE: Yeah, just turned 17 on the 1st of October, actually. So, we started the 1st of October 2007, and it was just Craig and I then, but we've grown it to a team of 27. We look at business clients and essentially their external IT department. And yeah, we're really proud. We've got some amazing people working for us. And look, people are what's the centre of our business. In fact, one of our core values is that we really care about people, and we're really fortunate to have an amazing team that go out and attempt to do that for our clients as well. 

05:57 

SRIDHAR KRISHNAMURTI: Well, you aptly named your business too, because a lot of people give lip service to that type of, we care type thing, but you guys really do. We work in the area of business as well as your personal life. And so, I've seen firsthand what you do. So, it's great. And so, you talked about some challenges that were going on at the time. So, we're sort of going to what was happening in the... when we met, what was lifelike? I remember it was quite a stressful time for you. 

06:23 

KEVIN RIDDLE: I think you keep joking about, Sridhar, about the fact that you've got this image of me putting my feet up on a desk or lying on a beach at some point, but that was just so far from where I was at that time. I think we talked about, there was a saying I used to say every time I met you was going, oh man, I've just got so much on my plate. And it seemed to be a rhetoric. And knowing now too, I was confirming that every time I was saying it to you in my mind, I was going, and as we'll get to a little bit later, I didn't realise that possibly now, that I was creating that thing. 

07:05 

SRIDHAR KRISHNAMURTI: I mean, to be fair, Kevin, if most people looked at what you were dealing with, they would agree that you had a lot on your plate, right? It's not that you didn't, it was just what... I think what I'm really looking forward to getting into in this conversation is what did you discover about that? And I think you're getting very... I think you've probably got your feet on the table at times now, because you definitely see much more. 

07:25 

KEVIN RIDDLE: Definitely starting to... I've definitely offloaded a lot. And really, when I say offloaded, it's more just my perception of the world now and myself and taking away a whole bunch of veils that we put in front of ourselves that we don't have any idea about. Of course, over my time in my life, I've done personal development things, and it was... It's always been about trying to be the best person I can. 

In fact, it was behind my story, and it probably appropriate to go back to then. Look, I think it was around six or seven that a really tiny event happened from an adult's perspective. But as a kid, my mum and dad separated when I was pretty young. And back in the seventies, that was still pretty rare. And so, at school, I think, I'm pretty sure, even though it was at an all-tiny school in Diamond Harbour, we were, I think, probably the only family that was... Mum was the... An only parent. 

So there was this element of being different, but... and not that I remember too much of my under five and that sort of thing, but mum said that, hey, look, I was this kid that was really easy, really joyful, happy, and all that sort of stuff, and said that I was a really good boy. So that probably tied in beautifully. One morning, I went up, and you know back in there, wasn't to get out of bed and stuff, and I went up and sneaked out to play with some toys. And I thought, oh, it's getting about the time everyone was going to wake up, so I sneaked back downstairs with this toy to play with in my bed. 

And I dropped it down the stairs, and it, of course, went crashing down the stairs. And I had suddenly... and I have no idea why, but had this sudden feeling of, oh, my goodness, I've just woken everybody up. And I'm going to get into heaps of trouble. Of course, I didn't. Like, Mum came out, and if I remember, I sat on the stairs, and I was bawling my eyes out. But in my mind, in the visual thing that I did, that I was suddenly this bad boy. 

SRIDHAR KRISHNAMURTI: You had decided it. 

KEVIN RIDDLE: I'd decided it. And so, man, I just had no idea that then for, you know, up until, you know, we met five years ago, that my whole life was defined by that. And, like, it just happens, like, it is, you know, and probably discussed by other people on this podcast and stuff. It happens in stealth. And so, the rest of my life, probably from that point onwards, was about proving everyone, to everyone, that I was this good boy.

SRIDHAR KRISHNAMURTI: And by stealth, I'm assuming you're meaning you had no idea it happened. And it's running your life. 

KEVIN RIDDLE: I had no idea. And so, you know, I like using analogies, and it's that whole thing, like, you know, back in the day, I meant to drive, it was a manual car, and you go to start learning for the first time, and it was, you know, the foot off the accelerator, foot on the clutch, change gear, and then foot off the clutch from the front. And you, you know, you think about those things. But this stuff was just all happening just automatically. You don't even have, there's no conscious thought about it. It's just, it's just happening underneath. 

And so, what blew me away, and of course, all of my life is that. And so, I really took that being a good boy to another level. And so, and I think what we discovered, or you helped me, helped me discover, was that that good boy turned into trying to be the superhero. 

SRIDHAR KRISHNAMURTI: Yeah. The bad boy, you mean the one that decided he was bad. 

KEVIN RIDDLE: That's right. 

SRIDHAR KRISHNAMURTI: Yeah. So, just to put a little context for people that may be watching this and not have any background or seen it before, we deal with something in the work is, is, you know, it's kind of like the, the realm of what we don't know, we don't know. And this, you know, my own story, Kevin, is when I had my turnaround in life, which I've shared before, I got hungry to turn my life around. And, but a lot of the stuff that I was learning wasn't actually giving me the result that I was looking for. And then I just got really committed. And I started to find that things that really worked weren't necessarily popular. There weren't things that everybody was talking about. And I sort of called them either by hidden or, you know, the hidden keys to success or the realm of what we don't know, we don't know. 

And I just wanted to give some context. I think that's what you're saying here is, you know, you didn't know that dropping the toy down the stairs that day created a whole identity for you. You went from this good, joyful boy to somebody who just decided in yourself, didn't realise you decided it, that, that sitting on the stairs crying is an important moment because you decided something that day and created an identity, right? Which is what we've spoken about. 

But what I'd love to, to find out, and I think what we'd love to hear is what was the sort of impact? So from that point, how did it, how did it impact you from, I think you said you were five, how, what was, what started to happen and what was the impact that that had on your life as, as you didn't know it, you know, up until the time we started to discover it? 

KEVIN RIDDLE: Yeah, well, it's interesting. And that's why I was saying, look, I'll take it for the first step. The first one was, you know, you know, all these things about saying I had heaps on my plate and all these things that were going on at the time. And, you know, things felt like they were starting to unravel for me. And, and, you know, I look back on it now. I, as I said, I thought I, I thought I knew myself really well. So when we started having a chat, we talked about a whole number of things about knowing about myself, but had no idea this thing was going on underneath. 

And then, so through the questioning and, and, you know, what was going on and where I was feeling at the moment, I, you know, came to that realization that, that I was, you know, coming out of this bad boy thing and, or I had realized that's where it was and I was a superhero. But, at that moment that I realised that's what I was doing, it suddenly was pretty impactful for me as well. Because I suddenly, if, if you remember, it was, had a massive impact on me because part of being the good boy and all those other things was, you know, my integrity was really important to me about being genuine and all the rest of it. But suddenly I realized that I was doing everything for everybody else to do, you know, like, and then I started questioning everything that I'd done up to that point in time, it felt like I didn't know myself. 

Like I was, you know, it was the most. And so, and, and it was a crazy experience. I remember saying, and, and I think the word that was used was this blueprint. I could just see, and suddenly this moment of coming to this realisation that all the stuff that I was doing was doing for everyone else. It wasn't actually me being my true self. 

SRIDHAR KRISHNAMURTI: Well, I mean, you know, part of the work, Kevin, and this is, it's quite an important thing here because it's a big thing to be talking about, you know, we, what you're really saying and the words that I would put to it in the context of the work is that we actually create before we even, we just don't know that it happens, but we create a story about who we are, right? And it's in moments of time, like that moment with the toy on the stairs or it can be anything seemingly big or small. It doesn't matter. It's a moment where there's a real heightened awareness and like a real fear. And in order to protect ourselves from experiencing the pain of that, whatever we went through, we actually create a story, an entire story or identity about who we believe ourselves to be. 

And we actually don't know we've done that. So, we just say, this is me or that we'll use words like, oh, that's just my personality. And you'll know now it's not. And so, the interesting thing with you, because it's, once we believe that story, it impacts every aspect of our life. 

KEVIN RIDDLE: Everything. 

SRIDHAR KRISHNAMURTI: Everything, right? And when you said earlier, you're a little surprised to be invited on the real one percenter call. I just remember it, Kevin, because, you know, sometimes we just do that step by step, right? Like when people are developing or beginning to understand their identity or their story they created, because as you said, it's not our genuine self anymore. That gets shoved to the side because we believe we have to be this persona to be good. You know, what you're saying is so important right now, because there's a lot of people out there that they don't know, but they're doing things to be a good person, but that's not necessarily genuine. 

And society pushes that, that we want, you know, be good, be this, be that. And it's like, we want to be good, but we want to genuinely, you know, what is that? 

KEVIN RIDDLE: It needs to come from a genuine, authentic place. And this, I thought it was but was far from it. Because I remember you talking about it and it really resonated with me is, you know, when you've got a little kid and they're playing around with something and, well, they might suddenly learn a new backflip of bits and pieces. And, you know, as parents, we come out and we go, oh, well done! That's amazing. And suddenly in a moment, the next time they go to do it, they're more concerned about looking at you to see what the reaction is, because suddenly they've been praised. And I thought, man, that is a really great analogy of about essentially what happened at that point in time. 

SRIDHAR KRISHNAMURTI: That's when their life changed. So instead of just enjoying the moment, doing the backflip, because that was their...

KEVIN RIDDLE: Being their authentic self. 

SRIDHAR KRISHNAMURTI: Yeah, being their authentic self, didn't care if they fell. It was like, well, I'm good if I do it. I got praised. Is the person that praised his mom or dad there to praise me for the, you know, and, and you'll see it after that. They'll keep looking and keep looking. But what I want to say about you, you know, cause I, I mentioned it about the real 1 percenter. You were really interesting, Kevin, because, you know, one of the reasons I put you, you know, very much at the top of the list is because one of the reasons is when you started investigating, you went, you, you don't do things by halves. You know, I remember you coming and saying, I saw this blueprint of my entire life. Like a lot of times people get that a lot more gently and we take one story at a time. 

KEVIN RIDDLE: It wasn't easy. 

SRIDHAR KRISHNAMURTI: Well, I mean, but you know, you obviously, that's where you were. And I always say, look, I can only help people go as far as they're already wanting to go. And we may not know that we want to go that far, but you obviously wanted to be your genuine self a hundred percent. And you got, you know.

KEVIN RIDDLE: The reaction was freezing. 

SRIDHAR KRISHNAMURTI: You look to the mirror quite intently, let's just say, but well, look, I mean that, what an amazing journey to be able to share. So, you had some, you know, you looked at the blueprint and said, hey, my life's been a story, and you realised all these motives that you have, but then, so how did, what happened since then? Right. Cause you, you know, the Kevin that I'm sitting here looking at and talking to you today, and I mean this in the best of ways that is, is you're just so genuine and the real Kevin is just as, as, as such a delight to be around. Like the, the other one was really cool, but he could be a bit, you know.

KEVIN RIDDLE: Bit stress ridden. 

SRIDHAR KRISHNAMURTI: It's just really joyful. So maybe would you, a real, something that could benefit us all is to share what was that journey like? So, you saw this blueprint, you saw, hey, I just created a motive. I thought I was a bad boy when I wasn't. I then you said you just started living the rest of your life to try to prove that you were a good boy and a superhero. So, everybody would think you were good. And you woke up to that quite suddenly in your case. And then, so what, so take us from the journey from there. So what? 

KEVIN RIDDLE: Yeah. So, so, look back now, incredible gift because, even though I probably looked at it initially, we're going, oh my goodness, I've been a fake for, you know, for the last 42 years or whatever it was at the time. And, and so I probably looked at it like that for the first time, actually, you know, giving myself a bit of a hard time. And if you remember, for quite a period after that, I felt completely lost because you suddenly went from an operating model that you had for your whole life to suddenly going, actually, what are the things I love doing? 

Because a lot of the things I think I was doing previously was to prove to everyone about what it was. So, did I like the things that I did for enjoyment? You know, did I want to be, the business owner, you know, anymore., and we'll talk a little bit about that as well as that, you know, it was incredible gift because even outside of, you know, following on from there. You know, you've worked with my business partner Craig, and I am into really get back and authentic about you know, because at that point of time I was at a real crossroad going actually... Because I wanted to be the best dad, the best person, the best husband and all the rest of it and actually because of the motive and the way I was doing it, you know there was definitely aspects of that, But there was a whole lot of stuff on it that was creating issues as well. 

And I guess you know there's some in there of the way I perceived that I was being you know all these good people and stuff like that actually wasn't. It was actually creating issues as well and one of the ones you know about being a superhero is things to be a superhero, things have to be going really bad you know, that's when that's when superheroes come in right? and so... Yeah and actually that part has only, I've only just really in the last four or five months realised the impact on that. And it's you know, it's been a bit of a rough road, but what it was this massive weight on my shoulders, because I had to feel like I had to do everything. 

Like, I probably wasn't leading at times. Like, I'm really proud of the business we created. But at times, I probably wasn't leading the business really well, because I felt I had to do everything. I had to do all these things, and that caused problems as well, because you don't delegate. Our business was growing, and so I ended up being the, you know, the, I was stymieing my own business. And so, there was that happening, and then unfortunately, not long after. 

SRIDHAR KRISHNAMURTI: That's a really profound thing you're saying, Kevin, because a lot of people will be doing it, right? Because we have a story that we're doing it. It's not just we're growing a business. We're doing it so we can look good. We can do this. And then what you just said is absolute gold, that we can, that can stymie, because the initial hard work leads to growth. But then what do you do? You've now got more to do. You're just that one person. I just wanted to pause there for a minute because that's real gold. But so it started to create some stresses. 

KEVIN RIDDLE: It was creating so many stresses, and that's why I was saying to, you know, like when I came to you, I had, you know, all this, you know, this, my plate was so full. But actually, I was just, I was doing it to myself. To then to fulfil my, you know, my story. And so, yeah, unfortunately, a really great gift at that time. But not long afterwards, it led to my, you know, and my wife at the time, you know, marriage coming to an end, you know, or we're going our separate ways. 

And so, and then also around going, hey, look, you know, I was seeing at the time that my business. I thought I was doing it for my family, for everybody else. And then going, actually, is this, is this the right thing for me going forward? And so, what was really great, though, is a gift out of that. Yet I had to work through tidying up some of these things that had now, you know, got a bit of a mess, and need to be sorted out. But it actually was a really great gift. Now, looking back on it is, is we were able to now look at the business and go, actually, what did I want from it? 

So, you know, you and I and Craig got together and reconnected about why we even started computer culture and got back to the roots of what it was. You know, we looked at our vision and what we wanted to create out of a business. And it was then suddenly, it was not easy because going through all those things. But also, it was a really good feeling getting back into actually the reasons why and connecting with that. And so...

SRIDHAR KRISHNAMURTI: It is so Interesting, because I know, you know, because I have something to do with your business in terms of how we've been working with that, you and Craig and me. And, you know, it led to a lot of changes in what you got, you know, what you're bringing to it. And it's like the original vision didn't change, but you've just it's 2.0, isn't it? And it's just interesting to see that when you because Craig, you know, great couple of business partners, you guys like family and what you've built together. But, you know, he got on board with it and, you know, you guys just got really genuine about the way you wanted to do it. And it's not a restart, but it's like you have the foundation. And what you built, I think, for about 12 years at that time, roughly 12 or 13, when we started working on that and what I watch with you two, what's really inspiring is that in bringing your genuine, more genuine selves to it, it's your roles have changed and, you know, the whole thing. And it's really just got a great dynamic energy to it. So, yeah, I just thought I would add to it. 

KEVIN RIDDLE: And look, I'm really grateful, you know, for, you know, for the work that you've done with Craig and I, but also to Craig and the team that I've got at Computer Culture, it wasn't easy for them to like I, you know, I don't underestimate. Yeah, it was a bit of a rough road for me, but also it was creating some real problems at work. And I guess that just shows the culture and the most incredible people that we've got at our business is they hang in there as well. They, you know, they keep saying, hey, look, this is the Kev, but I didn't know who it was at that point in time. I was starting to, you know, trying to learn who this new Kev 2.0 was. And of course, they were having to go through that ride as well. 

But everyone, even though there wasn't, there was certainly some easy moments, but we've now got to a pretty amazing place where we really want to take the business now. And we've got a really amazing team of people and all that SLT and my business and, you know, the rest of the team, you know, that raw core is still there. And so, what an incredible thing. Incredible thing for us to have sort of gone through, understand we're really clear about what we are as a business. You know, you know, it's a business that we all want to be proud of and pretty exciting about, you know, the future and where we're heading at the moment. 

SRIDHAR KRISHNAMURTI: And it's all new and expansive and new territory. An interesting question might be if you'd have to speculate here, but if you hadn't changed, you know, if that that Kevin that had the motives that we're talking about having motives of looking good and all that. But if you hadn't done all of this and, you know, you had to go back and say, what would computer culture have, you know, what would, what's your best look at? Where would it have gone if you hadn't changed? 

KEVIN RIDDLE: It's a really good question, Sridhar. I don't think it would have been a great outcome, to be honest. I was getting to the point where I was beyond myself. I didn't, I knew things weren't right. It was coming to quite a crescendo. And you know, I think it could have easily been disastrous for the business and left me in a really, you know, in a really burnt-out place. So, look, I guess one of the other things, too, is I'm really one of the other gifts, probably in the ones, you know, that, you know, we've been talking a little bit more about recently. There's things now, too, is that I've got a real sense of when things aren't right. And so, I think this discovery that, you know, that had an understanding around my story, they still it still keeps coming up, right? 

But also the great gift now is, is when things don't feel right, when they don't feel off center. I really investigate that now and are really excited about what might come out of it. I know a lot of the times when things aren't going right for a lot of people and I can only talk obviously for myself, but you think things are bad, things aren't great. And we look at that negatively. But actually, I'm starting to, to really embrace the fact that when things aren't going right, I really love that, too, because there's so much learning that comes out of it. 

SRIDHAR KRISHNAMURTI: That's like such a powerful thing, because most of us look at things are going good. Things are going bad. When they're going good, we get on a high. When they're going bad, we get on a low. 

KEVIN RIDDLE: Roller coaster. 

SRIDHAR KRISHNAMURTI: A definite roller coaster. But how powerful is it when you say things don't appear to be going well, what's the gift in that for me? Then everything is a win, right? And you just said something powerful. If you start looking forward to those things. Who can stop you, right? But what most have, which happens to most of us, oh, that's disappointing. And it just, it throws up a roadblock and it slows us down or, you know, unfortunately, a lot of people give up at that stage. So, you risk really giving us some, I love the word gold or gold nuggets. You're having some, you know, I knew you would. And certainly, appreciative for everybody on behalf of everybody watching or listening. 

So, Kevin, I've, one of the constructs that I work with are understandings that I work with is that, innately in us, in each human being, we have a desire. It's human nature to want to live our greatest lives. And I have a way that I illustrate that. And then I have a question for you. So, I often ask people, if you think about, say, you took a quiet moment when you get up in the morning and you just really look at your innermost thoughts, which of these three most closely resembles, you've heard this question, right? 

And I have a question on for all of us, for you. Which of these three most closely resembles your innermost dominant thinking? So did you get up this morning and say, you know, what I'd really love today is I just want my life. You know what I'm getting at? I want my life to be just a bit worse than it was yesterday. You know, I want to have that a bit less business success or work success. I want my relationship to be a bit more disconnected and argumentative. You know, I want my health to go a bit bad, be a bit worse today. So that's option one. Option two is, I don't want anything to change. Like, I just want, you know, the success levels to be the same, my health to be the same, my relationship to, everything to be the same. Or option three is I just want to have a bit more like whatever's important to me. If it's a relationship, I want to have a bit more connectedness with my loved one or with my kids, you know, my family or with any aspect of family. I want to have, you know, closer friendships rather than more distant ones. I want to have more business success or wealth or whatever the case might be. 

I think we can all see from that. You know, I've asked that question to a lot of people in a lot of groups and everybody says, well, obviously it's number three, right? We want to grow. And I say that we have a propensity, we have a human nature, it's human nature to want to grow and to have the most fulfilment in life that we can, not just success, but to be happy. And so, what I would ask you is in that journey, because that's really a basis of what, you know, a basis for what we speak about all the time. 

If someone just wasn't familiar, one of the reasons we started this podcast was to help share this word, because it is, you know, not the everyday conversations that people have. What would you say? It's kind of putting you on the spot because there might be a few, but what's the first one that comes to, I love it because when I have people on the podcast, they, they say something different because something different is important to them. And, I know you've applied a lot of stuff. You're a, you're a definite doer, but what's something that you would say to people, viewing or listening to this podcast? And they were over there saying, well, you know what? I want to live my greatest life. What's one thing that you, that comes to mind that you would most want to share with it from work?

KEVIN RIDDLE: Yeah. So, you're absolutely right., you know, I'm aware, to just put this into context., I'm aware that my story's there and it's something I need to work on daily anyway. So, so from that perspective, that number three, absolutely. I want to grow and learn more about how I can enhance, you know, that story or remove that veil of that story. To become more genuine myself. One of the things, that I'm, working on at the moment is, is around some creations that I'm doing around, what we're doing with the business. And so, you know, in the morning I really connect to and visualize, you know, where I want to with some of those things. 

Also, I got some, some changes, going on, on our new relationship and we've just brought, the families together and just recently, so after quite a wee while, we've now brought them, together. And so that's been a big step for us as well. But, have these creations of what I want it to look like and, and create, and, and so in the morning, it's a process of visualising that and understanding where I'm at. And I think that's, like I probably didn't realize how powerful that, that was and actually going through the process. 

I thought initially it would work well just by lying on bed and visualising, closing my eyes. And then there's definitely an aspect to that, but it's incredible. and I think it relates to, you know, hearing some, you know, famous, you know, people that have, sports people or whatever, have written down their goals, you know, writing their goals and putting them on the top of the wall and, and, you know, on top of the door so that they see it going through. But that, that process of writing down and seeing where you've got to from the day beforehand or what you've achieved recently by going, actually, where am I at right now and what are the next steps, I can do? That's, that's something that I'm really, I'm not perfect at it, don't get me wrong, but, it's something that I'm really, it's becoming a day-to-day routine for me. 

SRIDHAR KRISHNAMURTI: So, you'd suggest that for people. So basically, just to help, people to put the context. So, what we work with is that you, first of all, get genuine about what you want. So that's, that's always the first thing, like what you want is really what you want. So that's not influenced by the story. And we say that, you know, that because you really feel it, you get a moment of inspiration or clarity and inspiration. And then the process is once you do that, then you, the visualisation is like, you get yourself into a feeling place of having it. I work with athletes in that and there's training, you know, when they go for, for winning the race or whatever the case might be. Actually, visualize every single, you know, frame of it, you know, every, placement of the foot on the track and, you know, seeing the audience and seeing the people and seeing yourself crossing the line and taking the tape and all of that. 

So, it's getting to the feeling place and that's, what's really important. And then, the part about what you said of where you now, so it's a process where you gauge the, the process, whether it be small or big, right. And one of the reasons is because the mind, what we term as the ego mind is just the, or the resistant mind, whatever you want to call it. Oh, it just naturally wants to focus or conditioned to focus on what's going wrong and what we haven't done yet. And this is a process of going, hey, every single day, something is going forward for, you know, something is moving forward. 

KEVIN RIDDLE: It's such an incredible feeling. It's probably, yep. I've always been really good at visualizing, things, and seeing where I can go. That has come reasonably naturally. I know some, some people sometimes struggle with that. But, for me, that was, that part was, has been always been reasonably easy. but that, second part, especially, is writing down. It is such a, it's incredible, the impact that it has on me going, hey, I'm actually heading towards where I want to go. Because look what I did yesterday from my action list. I've now done something. 

And it could be somedays you do more than others, but even just knowing on those days where you go, Oh man, I probably didn't, I wasn't so as effective yesterday as I thought I was going to be, but there was always something that you can do and go, Oh man, I'm actually, don't be hard on yourself. This is the, you know, this is where the ego comes in again, as you're saying, but you can then look at it and go, wow! I've actually taken another step forward towards, towards that vision and that creation that I want to, you know, want to have. 

SRIDHAR KRISHNAMURTI: Well, it's bringing up that, that one of the things we talk about is the importance in power of focusing. And what that does is put the focus on what you're doing, not what you're not doing, not what we're not doing. And by putting the focus on what you're doing and what's happening, going right, then are you experiencing, oh, I know you are. Cause we talk about you're experiencing that it's growing more of more of you building the momentum towards getting to the outcomes that you want. 

So very interesting, Kevin, cause I know you've, you've applied so many different things. Like you, you know, people come to the work here and, that I do and, and they want this piece of it, or they want that piece of it. And, you know, one of the reasons I've asked you to come here is you won it all. You've, you know, you wanted every piece of it, right? And you've applied yourself accordingly. I find it really interesting that that's the part that you picked out. It's very inspiring to me because you've done so much work on story and on, you know, connecting with who you genuinely are. So, I'm quite inspired to hear what you would share with people is the, is the visualization and, recognition process of that, because it is powerful. And going forward, but it also shows me how far you've come. And, it's all about, proactive and what you're wanting to create.

Because a lot of times when people hear about stories, it's frightening to them, right? Because it's a frightening thing to think I may not be being my genuine self, and I may be doing what I'm doing because I have motives for doing it. Not because it's genuinely me, but we all do. That's just the way it's part of human life is that we have it. And I think what I'm really appreciative that you're bringing out at the moment or today is that we don't know that that process happened, you know, and it's like, it's a big thing to do. You know, it can be a fearful thing to look at that and, you know, to say, well, hey, but, but it's very important, isn't it? Because...

KEVIN RIDDLE: Certainly, there is, there are, so that one is really important and it seems to be a one that I'm, cause you know, like all these things there, it's about them becoming more of a habit around how you do things on a daily basis. And the more you do it, it just becomes part of your daily life. There's been a couple others as well that have been, that are really important to me, but probably come more, of more just automated in my life. This, the turnarounds were massive at the start and, and at times, probably struggled with them, but they're the ones that, were probably the most significant around suddenly getting to realizing where I was and actually come to the realization of my story. 

So, questioning, you know, everything that's going on, the reasons why you did stuff, and the emotional charge. So I'm really aware now that when I have an emotional charge, I now going, okay, what's going on here, Kev, what's, what's causing what part of my life or story is coming up for me now. And the other one is, you know, you know, and that's even for how I deal with other people. When you, you know, you start seeing in other people as well, you know, when they have the emotion is actually being really kind to them because... 

SRIDHAR KRISHNAMURTI: They're in a, having a story. 

KEVIN RIDDLE: Yeah, that's right. And you've, and I think the big thing is that we often get really upset about, other people about what they do, if they've done something and all the rest of it. But actually, I'm really, really clear and aware, these days that it's actually nothing about ourselves. And of course I was probably the one that did that the worst. Because I was, you know, you get emotional charge from someone. I thought, again, it fitted into my story of being a bad person. 

SRIDHAR KRISHNAMURTI: Yeah. And so, it was made about. 

KEVIN RIDDLE: So, I made it about myself when it was actually, which, but it was a really strong feeling. So, a couple of those things, you know, living my life on a daily basis allows us to be really, kind and genuine towards people. But also, it allows me now what we talked about before of also realising when some things are happening around, I go, okay, cool, what's going on now? What's, what's the new adventure of understanding, on what, what I can learn about myself or, get more from being this genuine person that I really want to be and authentic person. 

SRIDHAR KRISHNAMURTI: Wow. Well, Wow! That just felt like boom! right then, that just put the whole thing into context. And I do a recap of the, of the episodes. Cause, people sometimes talk about things that have, you know, impacted their lives. So, when you mentioned turnarounds, I'll talk a little bit about what that is in the recap. So, people can understand what was that turnaround process and what you're speaking. But what we can obviously see here, Kevin, is the impact that it's had. And, I always wondered how this was going to go. Cause I'm like, well, Kevin's one of these people that have applied everything, you know, and there's so many different, and I, you know, I want to thank you because I think we've got a real understanding of the different things that you've experienced, along the way. 

So that'll pretty much bring us to a wrap, but is there anything that you, if there was anything, not that there needs to be, but is there anything you think, okay, someone's out there listening and viewing, you know, where you've come to, is there anything else you'd want to say, to, to someone that's watching or listening to this in terms of the journey? 

KEVIN RIDDLE: It's a really good question. I hadn't, you know, something that just popped into my mind right now is, look, I first want to say, thank you. I'm really grateful our paths crossed. And, you know, there's some things that we've been talking about recently around, you know, how that happens. But the big thing for me is that, I would love, you know, if someone hearing the story and hears, you know, my story, and hears, some things that may resonate with them. Look, I would really suggest they go for it and start discovering, this as well. And, I know that, you know, if they could be, you know, start embracing some of these tools and learning about themselves and realizing that we all have these veils, then, I, you know, I genuinely do. I'd love to see other people benefit from, from this as well. 

SRIDHAR KRISHNAMURTI: Well, Kevin, like, I mean, that means a lot to me that you said that on this podcast, because look, all of this for me is about that. It's, you know, if I, if I can just share something, cause you've opened the door to allow that, you know, it's, when I came through, so I had a dark time in my life, my teens and in my early to mid-twenties, and I had a wakeup call, you know, an epiphany that life didn't have to be that way. And I started looking for things, you know, teachers, and I went to the library, I went to the bookshop, and I started learning and reading and, and a lot of it just sounded really good, but it didn't work. And I got super committed. I'm like, no, I'm going to live my greatest life. 

And, you know, you know, now when you get committed to something, things show up for you. And I started to just the most amazing teachers, right? They weren't necessarily the most popular and they started to show up in my life. And I started to learn things that were actually making a difference. And, and, and it's been that way for now for 30 years that it's continued. it means a lot to me that you said that we didn't, that I didn't put you up to that at all, but I look, this whole thing is, I want people to be able to have that in their life. And that's why we're doing the podcast. That's why I've asked you to have you take your time on a, on a Saturday morning to come and share, because, you know, I would love everyone to wake up to who they truly are. It's my mission and to live their, their greatest life. So, it means a lot to me. Thank you for saying that.   

I didn't know that's where you were going to go, but, you know, I would love for people to start because it's, it has, it makes a big difference, doesn't it? In your, in your life. It's not about me or the work because there's a lot of things going into the work.

KEVIN RIDDLE: Look, I know that I've still got, a long way to go, but you know, life's pretty exciting for me at the moment, as I said about the business, but also, you know, I mean, and you've, as I said, we've been in a relationship and we've all have families together and that's, and it, and it's, you know, I'm with someone that really resonates and life's, you know, life's pretty great at the moment. And, it, you know, it has its challenges when you bring families together and that sort of stuff, but it also has made that a lot easier because having these talks on board meant, oh, well, it's, you know, you can pick up the things where you would normally go, oh crap, things are going bad, but actually, you can, you can keep things in the context and genuine of what they're supposed to be rather than, you know, what they can end up being, when you're going through those challenging times as well. 

SRIDHAR KRISHNAMURTI: Good on top of you. Well, that's just been so inspiring, Kevin. And just, it's been, wonderful too, cause we chat on a regular basis, but to go back through, you know, what's happened, we just recalled, you know, what you were like when you came and just to see you here and what you're doing with your life is super inspiring. So, I just want to end with saying, hey, thank you very much for coming and for giving you time for sharing with all of us. This has just been so much gold. I usually dissect afterwards. I'm going to go, there's a lot of gold in this one that we're going to pan through and get, and, just thank you very much for your openness, honesty, for who you are, what you bring. And, thanks for sharing it with us today, Kevin, really appreciate you being here. 

KEVIN RIDDLE: Thanks Sridhar. It's been great. Thanks. 

SRIDHAR KRISHNAMURTI: Well, thank you for watching or listening. And, we look forward to seeing you on the next, how to be a real one 1%er podcast.