The Journey of Matt Cross: From Race Caller to Living Authentically

SRIDHAR: Well, hey everybody, welcome to our first episode of how to be a one percenter and I couldn't be any more delighted to have my guest Matt Cross today for the very first episode.

A lot of you will recognize Matt Cross just from looking at him. Matt's a leading senior race caller, so if you ever watch the horse racing, you'll see Matt or anything horse racing related you will have seen Matt because he's been in the industry a long time. He's amazing at what he does and firstly Matt, thank you for being here. I think when I think of the people that could be here on my first show, my first podcast, how appropriate is it that it's you.

We were just chatting earlier and realizing that it's been eight years that we've been doing work together and I'm just really glad you're here. So, thanks for coming in and being a part of this and being on the first show.

MATT CROSS: Yeah, thanks for the intro. I appreciate it. I guess yeah, it's a good time for reflection isn't it for you and I catching up again eight years and how many things have changed and what's different I guess for me and what's different for you and what's different for the world within that time as well.

But yeah, there's been a lot happened within that eight years. There's been a lot happened in the 22 years prior as well that you know we've talked about within that eight-year period and to get to where we are today you know I'm very appreciative of the conversations that we've had along the way.

SRIDHAR: There's certainly been some fascinating and interesting and somewhat deep ones at times. And well Matt look in terms of this podcast really the idea is called how to be a one percenter and but before we go down that track, it's really about not how to be the kind of one percenter that people generally talk about. It is how to be successful and it's one of the reasons I'm really thankful you're here is because you've achieved a very high level of success.

But we really want to redefine it, and you won't be surprised to hear this. This podcast and my work is really about redefining what being a one percenter is and to me one percenter is somebody who's living their genuine life. You know it's not just the success, it's living, knowing that we're living our genuine, being our genuine selves living our genuine life and that's what this is about and really sharing that journey because you'll probably agree with me that some of the things we've talked about over the last eight years are not everyday conversations and some of those topics that we bring up or you know pathways that we go down is, you know, they're not things that people may even know about some of them.

And this podcast is really about sharing some of those with people and how can they learn from that and get on their one percent pathway to living their greatest success in their greatest life.

So I'll throw you in the deep end and just say like I know we've had a lot of conversations about a lot of different things, but what's one thing that comes to mind if you were to say to somebody they wanted to live their genuine life and they you know they want they want to have all the success that they truly want to have. And I should stop and mention that just before we start that, I know from our conversations that you knew what you wanted to do from being 13 years old.

So at 13, you discovered, I think you told me you went to a horse race and you, correct me if I'm wrong, but you saw the man in the booth and you said, that's me, that's what I want to do. And, you know, I think one of the amazing things about you is because you just told me, I was thinking, how old is Matt now? Because we met when you were 23, didn't we?

MATT CROSS: Yeah, something like that. Yeah.

SRIDHAR: And you're 31. And, you know, for somebody to know what they want, that's phenomenal. And I just can't wait to hear a bit more about that story too. And I'm sure everyone can't. But the first question I have is, what's one thing that stands out to you from the 1% pathway, if we call that's what we've been doing, the 1% of people that actually live the life that they truly love to live. And I know you're definitely, I'm thinking about the things now that you've accomplished and what you've done, what you've set out to do, and including recently, which you may share, your big move, literally. Of a dream that you manifested. What's one thing that you would share with people about the 1% pathway? What's something important for people to know, possibly that we've discussed, or if you want to bring something out, but what's something that you would say that's something possibly new for people?

MATT CROSS: I think I could probably go down the path of comparing my career is obviously the easiest way to kind of use analogies or whatever. But I think as you said, I was incredibly clear on what I wanted to do and what I wanted to be. And for me, as a young guy who was able to feel that I'm so grateful for that, because a lot of people spend their whole life, the most part of it, trying to figure out what do be and what to do in terms of our career.

And for a lot of people, that is also a part of their identity. It doesn't become what I want to do for a job, it becomes what do you want to identify as.

And for me, at that stage, I looked up, as you said, and I saw the race caller who was the iconic Reon Murtha, who many people will know he was the god of race calling here in Canterbury for 30 odd years. And I looked up and I thought, you know, that's what I want to do. And ultimately, that's what I want to identify as. So, then I went on a pathway of trying to achieve that so that I could live my identity as a race caller. And I guess that when it come the time that I actually got the job to be able to do it. It did become my identity. Until we had conversations that, you know, that's not me. And there's so much more outside of that that I can kind of identify as. There's a lot more to life.

So, yeah, I had a switch, I guess. It was Cup Week, probably, I would say, three years ago, four years ago. And we had some conversations after it. I went into the week, with high levels of elation and excitement. And, you know, it was where I felt good. It was where I felt like I belonged. I thought people liked me. And I just had no thought of, you know, those negativity sort of things of, you know, people don't like me. I'm not good enough. Those sorts of things. They were gone for that week because I was riding this incredible high.

And then to come out of the week on the Monday, it was just a complete crash. It's, you know, a little bit like, for some people, it might be substances, or it could be gambling or, you know, whatever. And you get that high. But then when you come out of it, it's a long way down. So, at that point was a real shifting point for me because I had to move away from identifying as what I was doing for my job. And ultimately, it's a tricky one because a lot of people see me in that role and a lot of people don't see me. There's only, you know, you can count on two hands people who know me in depth away from my role. So for me, that's been the biggest or one of the biggest learnings from the work that you and I have done to be able to get into that kind of 1% mindset and get away from identifying as, for me, a race caller and going on the other hand and actually just identifying as Matt Cross.

SRIDHAR: Yeah. Wow. I really appreciate you sharing that because that's just such an important thing. You know, a lot of people look at people in your, well, you know, where and what you've got, particularly at such a young age. And I know that's been something people talk to you about, which is completely awesome. But I think people don't realize sometimes the pressure that comes with it or, you know, from that young, having, you know, thousands of people go, hey, man, this is the guy. And then all that's finished and the party's over, so to speak, and you're at home alone and you're like, okay, well, you know, who am I now? And so, I really appreciate you being honest about sharing that. Because I've seen a lot of successful people just feel that they have to keep propping that up. But the more they prop it up, the more that the other side gets quiet, gets louder. And then you mentioned substances and things like that. And there's a number of different things, whether it be people hide in relationships or ice cream or substances or something that's like, you know.

MATT CROSS: Singers are a great example. Those high-level singers, actors, as you say, the sports players, even they feel that high level of elation. And then post-match, for want of a better term. They're looking for that to continue. And they want to feel like that all the time. And I was in the same boat.

SRIDHAR: Yeah. And you said something earlier, which is really interesting, because you said something about what you didn't have to feel. So, when it was Cup Week, I'm sure everybody knows about Cup Week, but it's the big gala, like it's one of the biggest parties in all of Canterbury for the whole year. And you were like the main focus of that because you're the, you're the main caller for that whole thing. And you said something about that, that when that was over, I don't know if you said not enough, but you know. All of those feelings that, that were there, that were getting covered up, just get resurfaced. And it's really interesting because when you talk about that, that's the fantasy part, isn't it? Like with those singers.

And I did a study of some of the Hollywood, like I just looked into Hollywood because I was fascinated by, you know, these people are meant to have the looks, the money, where they do, you know, they're the best looking people apparently on the planet, and they've got the best houses and the fame and the fortune and the adoration. And they have drug addiction, they have suicides, they have, you know, as you're saying that, it's that constant need to prop that up and to stay there, which says to me that, hey, maybe that's not actually, you're not feeling that internally. You're needing something externally to keep you going.

So, I'd love to hear more so, what about that journey to genuine self? Would you be willing to say more about, would you say identity? Would you be willing to share a bit more about what was, what was that identity like? And what's some of the things that have happened to you as you've, as I know, you've done amazing work at being Matt Cross, like you're not Matt Cross, you're not the race caller, the senior main race caller, you're Matt Cross, who does that job now, which is a, that's in our conversation. So, could you share a bit more for people to, what was it like? Like, what was it like in that identity? And what are some of the things that you've done to connect with who you are? And what's it like?

MATT CROSS: Well, I think, ultimately it brought on a better sense of being present within what I was doing. So, if I can use Cup Week for an example, again, I think I've done five Cup Weeks now. And the first two or three, I was kind of in that state of just riding the high and how awesome is this? it's brilliant. And then when you and I had the conversation afterwards, and we mentioned that shift, then I was able to go back the next year and I was able to be, actually be present there versus, I don't know how to explain it, but being off in fairyland in some ways, I was for the first couple of years.

So then being able to make that shift has been brilliant in the sense that I'm able to go there now. I'm able to go into the week, be present there and don't get me wrong, I enjoy it. Like I genuinely love it, but enjoyment and loving what you do is a totally different conversation to the feeling of elation, and that overwhelming excitement, which in turn, I think affects your work in some ways. When you're going into it, if you go in with that elation and the excitement, you're going to do a good job, but not being present, you're probably missing that little percentage at the end.

So being able to be present there, I felt the year after that I went into it and I was able to be there in a sense, to put it simply. I was, I was there, I wasn't off in la-la land and I enjoyed it. I was able to go home after each day, be normal, park up, go back to work the next day, enjoy that. And then come the end of the week, it was funny that I remember the conversation that you and I had afterwards. And I said to you, I was like, when I got to the Monday, I was glad it was gone. Because ultimately those, those weeks, and you know, you can go back to the actors and then singers and rugby players, for example, in those moments where they're riding that high as such, if you want to stay there, that's an incredibly draining and ultimately becomes a dark place after all, because we're just not built for that. We're not made to be in those situations all the time.

So, for me to be able to go into that week and enjoy it, come out of it, and look back and think, oh, I'm so glad that's over. It's a totally different conversation year on year from what we were having. Whereas the year before I was saying to you, I just want to be back there. I want to be part of that. I want to feel like I'm part of that. I want to be part of that. I want to feel like that all the time. And then the shift for me was, as I say, being able to look back and go, thank goodness.

SRIDHAR: I remember the conversation that we had contact, we had spoken, I think it was just a few days after the Cup week that going back some years. And I remember you just saying, look, I feel really flat now. I feel really low. And what you're bringing up here, this is just such an important topic, Matt, because in my experience of what I do, and probably you too, because you're around, you know people in this industry that it's all, you know, you're out in front of people and people are liking you. They are looking up to you. They are liking you. And I think people can sometimes get the wrong impression of that. Like, hey, that's that person's life all the time. And they don't realize the pressure, you know, you're talking about, because I work with, you know, rugby players and athletes and performers and people of all different kinds. And it's like, that's what people, everybody expects you guys to, to be staying there. And then you want to, because you feel so high.

But I just remember you saying to me that time, you said, I just feel really flat, and I feel low. And it's kind of like, I want to be back at Cup Week again. You know, where do you go from here? And you have to wait another year for Cup Week and it's like, well, it actually backfires, doesn't it? Because you have, it's like, well, what now? Where do you go to, you know, from there and what's going to fill the gap? But you just said something so important, which is we're not meant to be at, you know, Cup Week all the time. That's meant to be a part of life. And then there's another part of life too. So, I really appreciate you sharing that.

So, what could you say? I know we have some pretty kind of deep and different conversations, but what would you say is one thing that led you to be able to see? Because what I'm hearing you say now, and correct me if I'm not, if I'm speaking not correctly, but you're saying that you're not your job and that's a thing that you really love to do when you're there. And it's something that you love to leave and live the other part of your life when that's done and have the balance to that as well. Getting that?

MATT CROSS: Yeah, for sure.

SRIDHAR: So, what's one thing that you did to make that shift? Like what, how did you go from, what did you do? Because there's probably a lot of people that can relate to this and go, oh yeah, I'm always chasing highs too. You know, it's no secret that I was addicted to drugs for some years of my earlier life. And I definitely know that chasing to feel better and the different ways we can do that. What's one thing that you did to just, to claim who you are?

MATT CROSS: I think, as I said, it was that shift of looking at the week itself and looking at those phases in your life and actually to put it simply looking at it and going, well, what's not great about this? I know often we'll look at situations and, you know, we'll go the other way, and we'll think for a bad situation, how do we make it good? But for me, it was that shift of understanding that that week was not, it's not a healthy week to be working because your brain is in overdrive. You're concentrating the whole week. It's, you know, it's tough on your body. It's tough on everybody within our industry that particular week. And I think a lot of us are on the same path, but I think stepping back from that and then kind of looking at what I was going home to or what I had for that next week and really appreciating that those little things, going for a walk or parking up, watching a show on Netflix or cooking a meal, they are things that you really need to appreciate. Because in the long run, you're doing that a lot more than what you're doing for me, it was Cup Week. So that big shift.

And I think the other, the other thing you mentioned about kind of identifying as a race caller as such, or through my time, identifying as a broadcaster, and that opens up the conversation of why are we identifying as that? What are we covering up? and using that identity to try and help us. I think it was just that, for me it was the feeling of belonging. It was the feeling of being liked. In some ways I guess for some people that can be attention in that sort of thing. So, to be able to shift away from that as well is another thing that just help you grow and appreciate it at the time, they'd be able to walk away from it.

SRIDHAR: I know one of the things that we do in our works is we question what is happening, why we feel disempowered or stressed out in any way. What's causing that. We look at the mental cause and I remember in my own journey. One of the real big things that I got was, I was really stressed out because as a business owner and it was one of these times where you know there's always ups and downs in every career. And I was really stressed out about it, and I thought okay well sure you'd stop and look at what you're stressed out about, and it was that, I was really stressed out about it, and I was really I was fearing failure.

And when I inquired into that and it was a really big changing day and you're bringing this up for me at the moment is, I just got this aha, I had this aha moment that, I'm not my business. Like until that time, it was like my business was me. If it didn't work, I'm a failure and you know I was putting all that there and I just woke up to, it's just a business. Like it's not an identity, is it? it's just what I do. It's not me and plenty of things I've done in my life haven't worked out well and plenty of things I've done in my life have. It doesn't say to me I'm a failure.

But I think this is such an important conversation, Matt, because so many people, we put our identities on what we do, and therefore we need those high times. And if the inevitable challenges come up or we are done with those times, well, who are we then? And, yeah, I can't be thankful enough for you bringing this up because this is the stuff that's so important to me, and I think it's the stuff that we don't see. I mean, my hope for this podcast was that we could surface some things that are underneath the surface that people generally don't see. It's like that we don't know that we don't know. And I just really appreciate you bringing that up because, you know, when we meet somebody at a party or whatever the case, you know, a gathering or something, what's the first question? You know, we say, hey....

MATT CROSS: what do you do?

SRIDHAR: What do you do? I'm a, you know, race caller. You know, I'm a....

MATT CROSS: But ultimately is the right answer to that, if I were to say to you, what do you do, one of your first answers is probably going to be you're a husband, you're a father, you're a friend, uncle, whatever you are, and then you say, oh, I'm for work...

SRIDHAR: Isn't that that's the way. I mean, that's generally what I'll do is I'll go, you know, what do you do? And I'll go, I do a lot of things. You know, like I'm talking to you right now. I'm not being a smartass. I'm like, that's really true. Like, what do I do? I do many things, but you're right. Yeah, for work, I do that. But how many of us actually identify ourselves with what we do? And therefore, I know, you know, one of the things that we've spoken about, because as a public figure, you know, people like to put you down and people like, you know, praise you and put you down and they have a crack.

And sometimes that's public, you know, that all comes with the territory, doesn't it? And people have a crack at you in public and that's not really nice. And, you know, we've had some conversations around this. Like, if our identity is put into that, well, they're insulting me, right? They're putting my identity down when in reality, we don't even know why they're seeing what they're seeing. And they're certainly not seeing you or they're certainly not seeing me. They're saying something that they, that's, you know, pushing a button or something of that nature. But isn't it just that important to not to, I just think what you're saying here is important. Isn't it so important to not be the, what you do? Isn't it important to not identify with that?

Well, what's it like? How about the other side? So, since you've done that, and I know you've done amazing work around that. Like, I've just watched you, you know, really just come into who you are, and you can see it now. Like, I haven't, because I don't live here in Canterbury anymore. I don't see you face to face. We see each other through a screen most of the time. I just, just your whole energy and grounded is the word, center it is what I can say, what I would say. So, what's it like when you, when you let that identity go? What's life like now when you just do your job? And you leave and you are present to cooking and present to Netflix? What's, how's it different?

MATT CROSS: Oh, I love going home from work and go home. And then my partner, Cherie, we live a pretty good life in the sense that we're both normally home at the same time. So, you know, we go home, and she works in the racing industry as well. And I think for both of us, we have an understanding that how important it is for us to go home and just be normal humans without still identifying as what we, what we do at work. And I think it's opened up a lot of things for us both in the sense that we've been able to concentrate a lot of that energy onto other things outside of our work, which ultimately our work is incredibly important.

It pays us. We love doing it. And it takes a lot of the time during our week where they're doing that. But yeah, we have a quite a good understanding between us of the importance of stepping away from that, going home. And as I said to you, the simple thing of cooking a meal and having a meal together or going for a walk or going to the shops and those sort of things, they become so important when you're able to shift away from that focus of needing to achieve at work. If I was still in that mindset that, that I was the first couple of years of doing my role, then I don't think that I would have the relationship that I do because the portion of energy that I put into that would be put onto my work. And then obviously what goes with that lack of energy over there is the stress that that brings. And then it all culminates. If you're making that identity and the job more important, then other things suffer, like your financials, your relationship, and ultimately your mental health.

SRIDHAR: I think you mentioned something earlier in the conversation, which was present. And that's a word that's kind of spoken about in my industry. It's sort of bandied around quite a bit, but it's one of the most important words because, and that's what I'm hearing from you is just being present. Cause if, you know, we have those high times, you know, like what we call in the high times of say your cup week or, you know, for me, like I love speaking when I get to go on a stage and there's, you know, I love that energy and there's, you know, hundreds of people and I get to share something or something like this, you know, this is that for me. Cause I'm just feeling really great.

And, you know, when we have that, if the moment that we leave that, that's like, that's not the now anymore. Like it's the actual reality, the universe we're now living. And as getting in the car or, you know, but that's, and if we're still like you say, and this is important, Matt, because how many people are with their partners, but not with them? I know that was me for a lot of my life. Like I'd be with my wife, but as you said, I'm still thinking about all the work or, you know, what's the thing that I'm going to be doing tomorrow or that thing that's going to make me feel good or whatever the case might be. Well, aren't we missing our life, are we actually missing it? And there it is right there. And that person that we love to have dinner with. And, you know, I sometimes say like, what if that was your last moment? You know, what if that was your last time you were going to be with that person? how would you feel about knowing that you were off thinking about something that wasn't even real?

MATT CROSS: I think that's a great thing to be conscious of what you just said there, particularly when you look at a relationship, for example. For me, I've always got that kind of thought in a way of, you know, if you're having a rough day and say you go to work. I don't want to be driving to work and thinking, oh, you know, I've just been a dork at home. What if that's the last time you kind of see them or whether it be your relationship or anybody? And I think that in some ways is a neat thing to have is that consciousness of, you know, what if, because ultimately this sounds really rough, but we could die tomorrow. Any of us, we could die today. And, you know, you want to be able to cherish it.

SRIDHAR: I mean, I was here in Christchurch during the earthquake times, you know, in 2011. You know, on February 22nd, I was, we're in town now and I wasn't far from here. And, you know, when you saw what happened, those people went to work just thinking they were going to come home. It was just a day like any other day. And I don't, I don't think either of us are trying to be morbid, but the truth is we don't know what the last time is.

But, you know, I think the important thing that we're bringing up here, which I think we're both alluding to is how often are we not present to those moments of our life because we're chasing that high instead of, or dealing with the load that came after it instead of saying, well, hey, this is just, what I'm doing now. Let me soak it in, see the good sides and the potentially the downsides of it. So, we can balance that out and, you know, not just keep chasing that same thing, but have that balance.

I mean, how important is it now? Cause I know you've had it for some years. How important is that balance of just going home? And I know you've said something about it, but for some reason it's coming up to ask you again, like how important is it to just go home and, you know, just have that quiet dinner to be away from the limelight and to just have that time. How important is it in the scheme of your overall you know, satisfaction in life?

MATT CROSS: It's huge. I think for anyone in our industry, it's the same. And often I see people within the racing industry, their commitment sometimes gets the better of them and they won't take a holiday or they're not present when they go home. And the thing about the industry that I work in is, there's a lot of highs and lows. Obviously, we have horse racing. There's a lot of money involved. People win, they feel great. People lose, they don't feel so good. But I think as a nation and as a community, the world is getting better at it than what we used to be. But I guess having these conversations will make it a lot better.

Yeah, it's a hard one. I think what I'd say to that too, Sridhar is, that it's not, for me, I'm not always 100% all the time present. And there's obviously points of, you know, my day sometimes that I look back and go, I wish I could have done that differently. So, I think what we're trying to say to people is that we're never, ever going to be in that scenario where, we're always 100% present. We're always saying and doing the right things. But I think if we can get on the trajectory of kind of making progress in a non-linear fashion, I think that's the best way to look at it.

SRIDHAR: Yeah, I really appreciate you bringing this up. Yeah, I was just having a conversation earlier with some, with a couple of people and they were just talking about how, you know, because I'm a coach and consultant and I work with amazing people like you all day and people kind of assume that I've got it all together all the time. And I'm like, no. That's not true. Yeah, no, no. I'm like, you know, I'm working on it just like everybody else. But it's the thing here is that it's the working on it, right? I think that's for me, that's a lot of awareness is a big word that I like to use, because people are kind of not present.

I know for me, if I use my example, I'm definitely not present all the time. I catch myself all the time. Well, okay, where are you? Bring yourself back. And but if I look at now compared to before, I was never present before. Like, I just didn't have any moments. Like, it was always, I had to chase something, or I had to get this or that. And I was just basically never present to my life, and I was missing it. And I think, you know, it is important to say, look, this is a journey. It's not like that. And I'm glad you said it because, it's the, how to be a one percenter. And I use the word pathways. This is about pathways for me, not some destination that is a one-off thing.

So, I appreciate you saying that. And yeah, but it's the focus on it though, isn't it? Like it's, I'm assuming it's made, I know because we speak about that has made a massive difference to make that mindset shift. So, there'll be a lot more of that sort of balance going on. And that's all we can hope for is that, is that we are increasing that. I love the way you said that. Increasing that in a non-linear fashion, which is, in other words, do the best we can to be present.

MATT CROSS: Yeah, I don't think anything I've gone forward in or achieved and has never been linear in the sense that it just keeps going up. You know, there's an old saying of two steps forward, one step back, and sometimes it's three forward and four back and those sorts of things. But I think those step back, those scenarios where you look at it, like it's a step back, you can, you'll appreciate this, they are opportunities, there are opportunities to readjust and kind of make that next step, which is going to be a forward movement.

And I guess learning along the way, and I think for me and my role and other things that I do in life, it's a hard thing to measure whether you're improving or not. But as you say, if you look back two or three years. And kind of zone yourself into where you were, things are, things are totally different.

SRIDHAR: Well, speaking of that, I'm going to pick your brain on one more thing because something occurred to me. So again, we just realized that we hadn't seen each other in person for two years and I'm going to pick your brain about, because part of what is the focus in the work that I do in my life is about creating the things we want in life. So, it's always about two things, which is, we've been speaking a lot about the internal journey, but we spoke earlier about you being 13 and knowing what you want. And we all know that story that you got there and through a lot of dedication got there at a very young age.

But I'm also thinking of a conversation that you and I had, and when we were doing the work together and you were doing so well with things and you'd got over some of the challenges that were happening. We said, well, Hey Matt, one of the things we do is we actually look at what you want your life to be like. And I'm trying to remember how old you were at the time, but you were mid-twenties, I think. And you know the reason I'm saying this? Because we wrote this down on a piece of paper and I can't let you leave without sharing this with people because you've created, or as we say, manifest or created everything on that list. I remember you said, do you mind if I recall some of that list?

I remember you said, I just want to have this really great relationship in my life. You said, I remember it was like, you talked about the house, and I just remember this. You said, I want this house, and I can remember you talked about, you said something about the picket fence kind of thing. You said, I want that. And you know, and you wanted the career. There were certain things that you wanted to achieve. There are some financial things that you wanted to achieve. And I think with you, I've got to pick your brain, not only because you're awesome, but because you know, if you can do all this, say between 13 and mid-twenties, you know a lot about how to create the life that you really want.

Because what I'm getting at is, on the last time that we had a conversation, you were taking me, you were, I hope you don't mind me saying this, but you were, you were taking me on the phone around that beautiful new house that you and your partner have had built. And I'm just like, you know, for me, I'm, it's a really lovely home by the way. And I was just, you know, I just got really, I got inspired cause, I knew that was a moment that you had just, you know, that's the moment that you could back on and say, look, that was all those years ago I said, I wanted that. And I'm like, look at Matt, go, he's got, he's created everything in his life that he wants.

So, what would you say to people like this is cause you, would you say, I know you're working on it and, but would you say compared to when you first saw that, you're really creating a lot of the life that you want to have, aren't you? like your life is, it's good. I know you've got more stuff to work on, but you've got a lot of what you stated that you wanted. And so, could you share with people that, cause everybody, we all want the life that we want to have, right? We all want to be able to do that and say, well, this is what I want. And this is what, so what would you share with people about how you've done that? What have you applied or, what would you share with them? What's some tools for them to be able to do that for themselves?

MATT CROSS: Well, I think every one of those things that you spoke about. It's none of them you can just make happen like that. And when I look back, say for example, at the house, there was a lot of steps that we put into place. And every day we were doing something that was going to put us in a position to be able to achieve that goal. So, we made a call that we were going to live with my partner's parents, which was the greatest thing. And hands down be one of the greatest things in my life that we've ever done for a lot of reasons, the family environment was incredible. Learning off them about the dynamics of, saving money and appreciating what you've got and not overspending and those sorts of things. So, we were able to put a lot of money away.

But it was a daily thing of being conscious of, okay, how does this sit with where I see myself going with this? And then over time we just chipped away, we chipped away, and we actually had a conversation. We were sitting in the house only a matter of a week ago. And I said to my partner, just have a look around the house and look at every single thing in here. There's been some thought from us put into every little bit that's in this house from the door handles to the color of the floor, to the things that are on the wall, the color of the walls, everything was from a thought. And that thought then went into action. And obviously along the way with the processes that we put in; we were able to achieve it. So, I'm grateful that we've been able to do that.

If you look on the other hand at the career side of things, I had a target. And for me, that target was kind of the end goal of calling the New Zealand Cup. That's the one thing that I wanted to do. And from when I was 13 to now, and obviously you kind of come along halfway through, I'd worked from 13 to say 22 or 23. I always had this thought in my mind. That I would just keep going on the path and wherever the path took me, I had the belief that it was going to get me where I needed to go. And that path went, veered left, veered right, it was up, it was down, there was doubt, there was frustration, there was, you know, a lot of frustration at points, but I always just keep going and it took me away from what I wanted to do.

And at the time I was like, okay, well that might be it. It's over. I'm not going to be able to achieve my goal of calling races. But everything now that I look back through that period where I was frustrated has helped me be in a position where I am now. So, there was always something that was helping me along the way. And then obviously you came along, and I then achieved that goal, but then that started another conversation for us was like, okay, well now I've achieved that. What now? What do I do now? Like I've done it, you know, in my mind I was thinking 40, 45, I'd be able to do that. And I did it at 25. So, then it started a whole other conversation for us.

The financial side of things, I'm still struggling to get my head around. Like I understand how it works, but I don't understand how it works. Because it just, money attracts money, simple. But I just don't, I cannot for the life of me, and I've thought about this long and hard in the work that we've done. I just wish that I knew, there's some little genie up there or what?

SRIDHAR: I just say to people that it just works, doesn't it? It's, you know, when I say I don't know, you know, we do live in a magical place. That's what people [36:17 inaudible], It's, you know, people say, oh, the world is terrible. And I'm like, you've said some gold here, Matt. Like it's, I really hope people are listening to what you're saying, because you talked about just putting a thought forward and then consistently taking action. And no matter how frustrating it got; you kept going. How many successful people would say, you know, I had some idea that I wanted to do, and I didn't stop, and I kept going like this.

MATT CROSS: How many Richie McCores are out there that we never saw play rugby?

SRIDHAR: 99% of them is the sad answer to that question, you know, and it's, here's what I know, because I love the work that I do because I live in that magic all the time, because I see people like you, you know, just doing the same thing. You put the thought forward, you take the action, you just, you know, when those frustrations come, you know how to deal with them. You get past the mental blocks, and you keep moving and I just keep seeing it work. And with the money side of things, it does. It's like when you just, you have that mindset shift because I worked really hard to try to change my financial life.

And then I learned the basic principles that we spoke about and it's like, okay, well, here's what I was told. If you start, you know, managing it really well and you have it be there, more of it's going to come to you. And I'm like, well, how does that work? Like I'm at that time, like my income isn't really fluctuating and it did like money came, opportunities came. So, like I say, kind of in jest, I don't know. And to some degree, that's true. How does this amazing world work? But the thing for me is how many people aren't finding out, that's the purpose of this podcast, Matt. How many people are not finding out that it works that way? How many people are just giving up on that dream, that Richie McCall that didn't make it? What a sad thing for that when their life could actually have been everything that they wanted it to be.

MATT CROSS: And you don't, you can start anywhere with any of that stuff. I know it might be easy for someone to say who, you know, might have a bit of money in the bank or comes from a good financial background. But I would say in some cases, those people are at a disadvantage, because they've already got it and they, yeah, you might be able to elaborate a little bit more on that. I think when you look at successful people around the world, a lot of those successful people have come from nothing. And then you see people from successful families who go to nothing. So, it can sometimes be an advantage when you're sitting there and thinking, well, I've got nothing. I don't have a job. My family don't have money. I'm not good at anything. Those sorts of things. That can be a huge tool.

SRIDHAR: Oh gosh, man, the gold just keeps coming in this way. There was, for a first podcast, I mean, you're just really bringing it. Thank you. Yeah, because look, I'm thankful every day. I, for one of the things, one of my practices is just take a moment to be appreciative of things in my life. That's actually a powerful attractor in and of itself is, you know, the more we complain, it's not true the more we get, the more appreciative we are, the more we get. And, you know, I'm thankful for each and every day. Like I don't try to make it happen. I just get present to what I'm appreciative of. And one of those things is my challenging times in life. I'm actually thankful for my addictive years, you know, when I was on drugs earlier on in that, because when people are handed everything, like how do they develop desire? How did they develop, you know, in the brain, how did they develop drive? How did they develop these, why do they want to dream? Everything was just given to them. They had nothing.

And because it was given to them, they don't learn to do what you're talking about. They don't learn to manage it. They're just like, well, hey, life will just give me everything all the time. So, they'll go and blow it. And then, you know, a lot of those people end up, you know, the parents that were doing that might die or they run out of money or whatever the case might be. They're in trouble then, because then there's nothing in there. I mean, sometimes it's the catalyst that gets them to then, you know, get driven or something, but they're at a huge disadvantage.

And, you know, one of the things that we, you know, as you know, we've done in our work is to find those early challenges that we had and harness them, really realize that, hey, those weren't bad things. They might've seemed bad, but they actually served you. They're a part of what got you to be the person that you are and have the dreams that you have and follow them. So yeah, it's quite important. But there is, you know, I think this is why I'm so thankful you're here because I can talk about it. But if I'm just one person saying, hey, this world is magical if you just commit to what you want in life you're going to start getting everything to help it and if you start taking care of wealth you'll find more is going to come to you and if you take care of your, focus on your relationship it's going to get you know, there'll be ups and downs but it'll get better. If you want that house and you stay focused on it, it's like things will happen to allow you to get it.

And the best I can say is that my experience is, whatever it is you know, is it a genie, is it a world, I just think we live in a, a lot of us don't understand how amazing this world was actually created. And that we're creators you know, that's what we're doing. We're here to create.

MATT CROSS: I think too, if I can take you back to the moment where I had, I don't know an epiphany is the word, but when I got that overwhelming feeling of like that's me, that's what I want to do, I think where some people come unstuck is people experience that, but then moments later the doubt kicks in and shuts it down. I think the key is to be able to shut that doubt out. There's obviously going to be some things in the world that just aren't meant for you. But I think in that scenario, if you get that really overwhelming is probably not the word, that clarity, I think. If you have a moment of clarity where you know that that's what you want to do. I would say to push through the doubt and just keep going.

SRIDHAR: If I said to you like really to realize you know question that doubt and find out what's behind it and realize that that's not even something you need to doubt.

MATT CROSS: Well, more often than not it’s thinking what other people will think about you.

SRIDHAR: And who cares at the end of the day, like should that stop you from doing what it is that you that you really want to do? well this is, Matt, he's just such an inspiring guy. I can't say thanks enough for making the time to be here and to help me launch this podcast. It couldn't have been done in a more beautiful way. So, yeah, thanks for what you've brought. You've just, afterwards I tend to dissect this and just you know kind of say a little bit more about some of the things, so people can hopefully go forward in their own lives from some of the things that you've shared. But there's so much gold in this one already just thinking about it. You've just brought so much gold to us. So, yeah, look it's just such a pleasure to know you and to have the conversation we've had for eight years now and to see what's happened with your life. So, what an awesome experience, it's a great pleasure and yeah, thank you for coming on and be a part of that.